Donna Tartt quote #10 from The Secret History

What are the dead anyway but waves and energy Light shining from a dead starThat by the way is a phrase of Julians. I remember it from a lecture of his on the Iliad when Patroklos appears to Achilles in a dream. There is a very moving passage where Achilles overjoyed at the sight of the apparition tries to throw his arms around the ghost of his old friend and it vanishes. The dead appear to us in dreams said Julian because thats the only way they can make us see them what we see is only a projection beamed from a great distance light shining at us from a dead starWhich reminds me by the way of a dream I had a couple of weeks ago.I found myself in a strange deserted city an old city like London underpopulated by war or disease. It was night the streets were dark bombed-out abandoned. For a long time I wandered aimlessly past ruined parks blasted statuary vacant lots overgrown with weeds and collapsed apartment houses with rusted girders poking out of their sides like ribs. But here and there interspersed among the desolate shells of the heavy old public buildings I began to see new buildings too which were connected by futuristic walkways lit from beneath. Long cool perspectives of modern architecture rising phosphorescent and eerie from the rubble.I went inside one of these new buildings. It was like a laboratory maybe or a museum. My footsteps echoed on the tile floors.There was a cluster of men all smoking pipes gathered around an exhibit in a glass case that gleamed in the dim light and lit their faces ghoulishly from below.I drew nearer. In the case was a machine revolving slowly on a turntable a machine with metal parts that slid in and out and collapsed in upon themselves to form new images. An Inca temple click click click the Pyramids the Parthenon.History passing beneath my very eyes changing every moment.I thought Id find you here said a voice at my elbow.It was Henry. His gaze was steady and impassive in the dim light. Above his ear beneath the wire stem of his spectacles I could just make out the powder burn and the dark hole in his right temple.I was glad to see him though not exactly surprised. You know I said to him everybody is saying that youre dead.He stared down at the machine. The Colosseum click click click the Pantheon. Im not dead he said. Im only having a bit of trouble with my passport.WhatHe cleared his throat. My movements are restricted he said.I no longer have the ability to travel as freely as I would like.Hagia Sophia. St. Marks in Venice. What is this place I asked him.That information is classified Im afraid.1 looked around curiously. It seemed that I was the only visitor.Is it open to the public I said.Not generally no.I looked at him. There was so much I wanted to ask him so much I wanted to say but somehow I knew there wasnt time and even if there was that it was all somehow beside the point.Are you happy here I said at last.He considered this for a moment. Not particularly he said.But youre not very happy where you are either.St. Basils in Moscow. Chartres. Salisbury and Amiens. He glanced at his watch.I hope youll excuse me he said but Im late for an appointment.He turned from me and walked away. I watched his back receding down the long gleaming hall.

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