To be brave is to love someone unconditionally without expecting anything in return. To just give. That takes courage because we dont want to fall on our faces or leave ourselves open to hurt.

I wont telephone him. Ill never telephone him again as long as I live. Hell rot in hell before Ill call him up. You dont have to give me strength God I have it myself. If he wanted me he could get me. He knows where I am. He knows Im waiting here. Hes so sure of me so sure. I wonder why they hate you as soon as they are sure of you.

I should go I said thickly. Let me know when you want to start practice again. And thanks for...talking.I started to turn then I heard him say abruptly No.I glanced back. WhatHe held my gaze and something warm and wonderful and powerful shot between us.No he repeated. I told her no.I... I shut my mouth before my jaw hit the floor. But...why That was a once-in-a-lifetime thing. You could have had a baby. And she...she was you know into you...The ghost of a smile flickered on his face. Yes she was. Is. And thats why I had to say no. I couldnt return that...couldnt give her what she wanted. Not when... He took a few steps toward me. Not when my heart is somewhere else.

What if love wasnt the act of finding what you were missing but the give-and-take that made you both match

Every widow wakes one morning perhaps after years of pure and unwavering grieving to realize she slept a good nights sleep and will be able to eat breakfast and doesnt hear her husbands ghost all the time but only some of the time. Her grief is replaced with a useful sadness. Every parent who loses a child finds a way to laugh again. The timbre begins to fade. The edge dulls. The hurt lessens. Every love is carved from loss. Mine was. Yours is. Your great-great-great-grandchildrens will be. But we learn to live in that love.

But beauty is about finding the right fit the most natural fit To be perfect you have to feel perfect about yourself --- avoid trying to be something youre not. For a goddess thats especially hard. We can change so easily.-Aphrodite

Except fang. I glared at him. Go on try to stop me I dare you. It was like the old days when we used to wrestle each trying to get the better of the other. I was ready to take him down my hands curled into fist. I was just going to say be careful Fang told me. He stepped closer and brushed some hair out of my eyes. And Ive got your back. He motioned with his head toward the torpedo chamber. Oh my God. It hit me like a tsunami then how perfect he was for me how no one else would ever could ever be so perfect for me how he was everything I could possibly hope for as a friend boyfriend maybe even more. He was it for me. There would be no more looking. I really really loved him with a whole new kind of love Id never felt before something that made every other kind of love Id ever felt feel washed out and wimpy in comparison. I loved him with every cell in my body every thought in my head every feather in my wings every breathe in my lungs. and air sacs. Too bad I was going out to face almost certain death. Right there in front of everyone I threw my arms around his neck and smashed my mouth against his. He was startled for a second then his strong arms wrapped around me so tightly I could hardly breathe. ZOMG I heard Nudge whisper but still fang and I kissed slanting our heads this way and that to get closer. I could have stood there and kissed him happily for the next millennium but Angel or what was left of her was still out there in the could dark ocean. Reluctantly I ended the kiss took a step back. Fangs obsidian eyes were glittering brightly and his stoic face had a look of wonder on it.Gotta go I said quietly. A half smile quirked his mouth. Yeah. Hurry back. I nodded and he stepped out of the air lock chamber keeping his eyes fixed on me memorizing me as he hit the switch that sealed the chamber. The doors hissed shut with a kind of finality and I realized that my heart was beating so hard it felt like it was going to start snapping ribs. I was scared. I was crazily deeply incredibly joyously terrifyingly in love. I was on a death mission. Before my head simply exploded from so much emotion I hit the large button that pressurized the air lock enough for the doors to open to the ocean outside. I really really hoped that I would prove somewhat uncrushable like Angel did. The door cracked open below me and I saw the first dark glint of frigid water.

I mean its not surprising really. Once you love something you always love it in some way. You have to. Its like part of you for good.

Some feelings sink so deep into the heart that only loneliness can help you find them again. Some truths are so painful that only shame can help you live with them. Some things are so sad that only your soul can do the crying for them.

How can something so wrong feel so right