The fight unfolded like background noise. White noise. In the foreground even with his ghastly pale face looking dead in my hands my fingers clenching his ragged hair all I could see was random images of Fang not dead.Fang telling me stupid fart jokes from the dog crate next to mine at the school trying to make me laugh.Fang asleep at Jebs old house and me jumping wildly on his bed to wake him up. Him pretending to be asleep. Me laughing when I accidentally kicked him where it counts. Him dumping me off the bed.Fang gagging on my first attempt at cooking dinner after Jeb disappeared. Him spitting out the mac and cheese. Me dumping the rest of the bowl on him in response.Fang on the beach that first time he was badly injured. Me realizing how I felt about him.Fang kissing me. So close I couldnt even see his dark eyes anymore. The first time. The second time. The third.I could always remember each and every one of them. Would always remember them.Fang.Not.Dead.

Love is scary it changes it can go away. Thats the part of the risk. I dont want to be scared anymore.

Long distance is hard. You have to trust that as you each change on your own your relationship will also change along with you. It takes hope good humor and idealism. It takes a massive dose of courage to protect the relationship at all odds. It is hard but worth it. Youll both be stronger as a result.

You can never be wise and be in love at the same time.

So I learned two things that night and the next day from him the perfection of a moment and the fleeting nature of it.

You didnt think Id let you go alone did youNo but Im grateful that I had you with me.Grateful is all Im going to get isnt itWhat else were you hoping forAdoration devotion affection infatuation or just plain finding me irresistible.Sorry Don Juan. Youll have to live with my undying gratitude.

The Universe is very very big.It also loves a paradox. For example it has some extremely strict rules.Rule number one Nothing lasts forever.Not you or your family or your house or your planet or the sun. It is an absolute rule. Therefore when someone says that their love will never die it means that their love is not real for everything that is real dies. Rule number two Everything lasts forever.

Dont let yourself die without knowing the wonder of fucking with love.

Celia wait Marco says standing but not moving closer to her. You are breaking my heart. You told me once that I reminded you of your father. That you never wanted to suffer the way your mother did for him but you are doing exactly that to me. You keep leaving me. You leave me longing for you again and again when I would give anything for you to stay and it is killing me. It has to kill one of us Celia says quietly.

The suns gone dim and the moons gone black. For I loved him and he didnt love back.