Only now in rhythmic waves was she struck by her stupidity her blindness her estheronautiness and above all her longing the insult of the power of her longing and she knew very well that is was these shortcomings that had made her so eager to interweave in his story the threads of her secret dreams of candor and of painful purifying honesty of a generous togetherness in which everything was possible. For a moment with all that had been spun and stabbed and defiled within her her face took on the expression of a frightened abandoned girl who lunges out to bite who lives unimaginably close to the skins surface ready to be drawn out like a final plan of retreat.