Her bed felt huge and empty now and when she slept she did so with her arm around a pillow. She dreamed of him almost every night sometimes good dreams of happy days and joyful times often they were terrible dreams of abandonment loss and sorrow. She didnt know which was worse every morning she woke afresh to the knowledge that he was gone and he would never come back. It would never be all right again.
One just one but definitely one of the great benefits of private prayer is that you cant hide from your motives. In corporate prayer we can sound like all that. We can blow Jesus smoke like nobodys bizness in a crowd but get alone with Him and He wont let you get away with the fake stuff. Try blowing Jesus smoke in your prayer closet and youll cough on it every time. Truth That penetrating gaze of His hurts but afterwards it never fails to heal.
It was one of those dreams from which she woke up depressed about her reality filled with a longing that pulled at her insides wishing the dream could have lasted forever or at least much longer than it had.