Eight full lives I whispered against his jaw my voice breaking. Eight full lives and I never found anyone I would stay on a planet for anyone I would follow when they left. I never found a partner. Why now Why you Youre not of my species. How can you be my partnerIts a strange universe he murmured.Its not fair I complained echoing Sunnys words. It wasnt fair. How could I find this find lovenow in this eleventh hourand have to leave it Was it fair that my soul and body couldnt reconcile Was it fair that I had to love Melanie too Was it fair that Ian would suffer He deserved happiness if anyone did. Itwasnt fair or right or evensane. How could I do this to himI love you I whispered.Dont say that like youre saying goodbye.But I had to. I the soul called Wanderer love you human Ian. And that will never change no matter what I might become. I worded it carefully so that there would be no lie in my voice. If I were a Dolphin or a Bear or a Flower it wouldnt matter. I would always love you always remember you. You will be my only partner.

Until this moment I had not realized that someone could break your heart twice along the very same fault lines.

Had I the heavens embroidered clothsEnwrought with golden and silver lightThe blue and the dim and the dark clothsOf night and light and the half lightI would spread the cloths under your feetBut I being poor have only my dreamsI have spread my dreams under your feetTread softly because you tread on my dreams.

He did not care if she was heartless vicious and vulgar stupid and grasping he loved her. He would rather have misery with one than happiness with the other.

He suddenly recalled from Platos Symposium People were hermaphrodites until God split then in two and now all the halves wander the world over seeking one another. Love is the longing for the half of ourselves we have lost.

How do I love thee Let me count the ways.I love thee to the depth and breadth and heightMy soul can reach when feeling out of sightFor the ends of being and ideal grace.I love thee to the level of every daysMost quiet need by sun and candle-light.I love thee freely as men strive for right.I love thee purely as they turn from praise.I love thee with the passion put to useIn my old griefs and with my childhoods faith.I love thee with a love I seemed to loseWith my lost saints. I love thee with the breathSmiles tears of all my life and if God chooseI shall but love thee better after death.

You dont take away my choices. You are my choice.

My sister will die over and over again for the rest of my life. Grief is forever. It doesnt go away it becomes a part of you step for step breath for breath. I will never stop grieving Bailey because I will never stop loving her. Thats just how it is. Grief and love are conjoined you dont get one without the other. All I can do is love her and love the world emulate her by living with daring and spirit and joy.

I dont love you anymore she whispered. I dont love you at all. His throat closed. Its all right sweetheart. I love you enough for both of us.

Choose your love. Love your choice.