He promised us that everything would be okay. I was a child but I knew that everything would not be okay. That did not make my father a liar. It made him my father.

I wanted to tell her everything maybe if Id been able to we could have lived differently maybe Id be there with you now instead of here. Maybe... if Id said Im so afraid of losing something I love that I refuse to love anything maybe that would have made the impossible possible. Maybe but I couldnt do it I had buried too much too deeply inside me. And here I am instead of there.

In bed that night I invented a special drain that would be underneath every pillow in New York and would connect to the reservoir. Whenever people cried themselves to sleep the tears would all go to the same place and in the morning the weatherman could report if the water level of the Reservoir of Tears had gone up or down and you could know if New York is in heavy boots.

My dream went all the way back to the beginning. The rain rose into the clouds and the animals descended the ramp.