I had a dream about you. I thought together we could change the world but you said youd rather change the TV channel. But you were all talk because you never even did that. So I sat there with you watching the Fiction Channel otherwise known as a 24-hour news station.

I had a dream about you. I was trying to dissect love like it was a frog and you were trying to dissect a frog like it was love. I said we should team up and have sex and you said Sure Ill have sex with youfor twenty bucks. Geez For half that I can get twice the value in two twins and a ham sandwich down at the trailer park. Sure the combined age of the twins is 140 but at least the sandwich will be fresh.

I had a dream about you. You looked so beautiful that I felt compelled to say something. So I said The fish taco wasnt nearly as stinky as I imagined itd be. You looked at me with your gorgeous eyes and said Life isnt all roses to the noseless and those with eyes need to listen closely. I nodded my head in agreement even though I didnt have a clue what you meant. But thats what love does right It makes men clueless.

I had a dream about you. We picked up where we left off with leftovers and I said this was the best second-time dinner Ive ever had a first time. Oh I had it before when it was fresh and first made but this was the first time I was having it for a second time and that made it special like a tie at the Olympics. Would both winners get medals made of two metals gold and silver Thats what I thought about as I chewed the food as I tried to remember what it tasted like the first time.

I had a dream about you. You said you were leaving me and I said When are you coming back You said I dont think Im ever coming back. And I replied So youre going to Walmart huh Those checkout lines can take an eternity to get through. Well pick me up some chips while youre there.

I had a dream about you. I had converted a beached whale into a tour bus and I asked you to be my driver. You asked what kind of people youd be driving around and I said Dead people. You frowned and said Dead people dont tip. And I said Yes but they also dont protest when you root through their pockets.

I had a dream about you. Id just invented a flying bathtub and you were dirty and afraid of heights. I thought I could cure both at once so I tricked you into getting naked and getting in. Actually thats all I really wanted was to get you naked so I never even pushed the launch button or turned on the water. Isnt love wonderful

I had a dream about you. We were playing football soccer and I just needed to score one goal to win. Of course one goal was one more than Id scored so far so it might be next to impossible. One is certainly next to nothing but it might also be next to everything. In love one is also next to nothingand next to everything as two is all you need to make eternity.

I had a dream about you. You asked how long Ive loved you and I replied About 5280 feet. It was true. Ever since the car ran out of gas a mile back and we were forced to walk Ive been thinking a lot about life love and how much I wish the first gas station we see has mashed-potato-flavored bubblegum.

I had a dream about you. You told me you circled three words in three books scattered in the Library of Alexandria the one that supposedly burnt down centuries ago. You wouldnt tell me what words what books or give me any clues at all so I just assumed those three words were I love you and I thought about that while I made love to a being of light who made sure I was completely dry the whole time so I didnt get electrocuted.