I had a dream about you. You told me you loved me and then you stabbed me with a spoon. Luckily moments before your attack I assumed the identity of a bowl of Jell-O. Later on in the dream as a half-eaten bowl of Jell-O I launched a successful political campaign got elected and moved to Washington DC.

I had a dream about you. You were a lone candle on a barren vanilla cake and I was the mighty breath sent to extinguish your light. I felt like Gods wrath coming down to destroy the Illuminati while you probably thought I was the Satan coming to snuff out the light of the world. And the spectators who were gathered around the spectacle probably thought it was all one big party as they stood still like mindless zombies singing Happy Birthday.

I had a dream about you. You were storing my brain in a pickle jar in the fridge and I only discovered it when I went to garnish my hamburger. Mindless and hungry I was a US politicians ideal voter.

I had a dream about you. Your face was puffy like a puffer fish only puffier and I thought it was from crying. Nope turns out you were just fat. But at least you were fat and happy.

A female cop in my dream observes a shuffle and takes note but doesnt fully see the bank robbery I have just committed during the planned distraction. All she sees is a man with a lot of money and draws the wrong conclusionthat I am more handsome now than I was when she didnt know I had money and she saw me walk in the door.

I boasted that I bested the best and I did. I beat my clone. In my dream of course but who cares Its still a victory.

The door handle is on the wrong side of the door. Its on the inside only only in my dreams. I can leave but I cant return.

I had a dream about you. You invited me to a picnic so I brought two bottles of mustardone for me and one for the guy who always holds your leash. When I got there I wondered who is that guy why are you on a leash and who brought the baloney if anybody

I once had a dream about a woman and the next day she died. I stopped sleeping for three days after that to try to save some lives but then my body relented and I went back to being a murderer.

Sometimes I get advice from the fictional characters in my dreams. Sometimes Its good and sometimes its nonsensical.