Poison Ivy tastes like an itch when you have it on your tongue and Id say that love tastes the same only itchier.

Hydrogenated and androgynous milky white love is all I have to offer you. Would you like me to pour it in your coffee or directly into your soul

Death cannot stop true love. Thats why its pointless for me to try to murder all my adoring female fans.

The wind blew my words away from you. So while I told you I love you the phrase was carried in the opposite direction and landed 333 miles away in the ears of a confused farmer. He was nice though. He sent me a kind letter saying that while he was flattered I wasnt really his type.

In my dream I woke up to realize I was tired and needed to go to sleep. Then I slowly remembered that I was asleep but that I needed to wake up and write this down. Blah.

Dream headline from Orafouraville Times Man Let Go By Employer Falls To Death

I dont collect awards I collect empty trophy cases. Once my collection is large enough Im going to start collecting broken dreams.