I had a dream about you. We went for a rideyou on all fours and me on your back and you didnt like it when I kept calling you donkey face. I was shocked and I said You should be flattered that I think you look like Miley Cyrus.

I had a dream about you. You had no skin or muscle on your face and to try to conceal your bare skull you liberally applied lipstick and makeup. Your birthday was coming up and I knew you were probably sensitive about parties that emphasize the aging process so I decided to box up your gift in a coffin and wrap it with black wrapping paper. I got you the best gift ever tooa hooker who happened to be dead because that enabled me to procure a sizeable discount.

I had a dream about you. I sat at your table of brotherhood and asked why you invited so many strangers. You laughed and passed me the bread bowl. But the guest in-between us took the last roll before it reached me.

I had a dream about you. We were in a canoe and we were paddling across the desert. You said you were thirsty and I pointed to the sand that surrounded us and said No I will not urinate in your mouth. At that point I woke up because I realized I really had to peeand get a drink of water.

I had a dream about you. You winked at me and said the meats fresh and I didnt know which meat you were referring to. So I zipped up my pants and left the Mens room in a hurry. Id rather buy my thinly sliced beef somewhere else.

Four times during the first six days they were assembled and briefed and then sent back. Once they took off and were flying in formation when the control tower summoned them down. The more it rained the worse they suffered. The worse they suffered the more they prayed that it would continue raining. All through the night men looked at the sky and were saddened by the stars. All through the day they looked at the bomb line on the big wobbling easel map of Italy that blew over in the wind and was dragged in under the awning of the intelligence tent every time the rain began. The bomb line was a scarlet band of narrow satin ribbon that delineated the forward most position of the Allied ground forces in every sector of the Italian mainland.For hours they stared relentlessly at the scarlet ribbon on the map and hated it because it would not move up high enough to encompass the city.When night fell they congregated in the darkness with flashlights continuing their macabre vigil at the bomb line in brooding entreaty as though hoping to move the ribbon up by the collective weight of their sullen prayers. I really cant believe it Clevinger exclaimed to Yossarian in a voice rising and falling in protest and wonder. Its a complete reversion to primitive superstition. Theyre confusing cause and effect. It makes as much sense as knocking on wood or crossing your fingers. They really believe that we wouldnt have to fly that mission tomorrow if someone would only tiptoe up to the map in the middle of the night and move the bomb line over Bologna. Can you imagine You and I must be the only rational ones left.In the middle of the night Yossarian knocked on wood crossed his fingers and tiptoed out of his tent to move the bomb line up over Bologna.

I had a dream about you. You had just died and I was debating putting your body into either a coffin or a shoebox. My decision was based solely on spatial concerns so I chose the ashtray because I thought it best to smoke your essence like a cigarette.

I had a dream about you. At first you were a mannequin and I was a fashion designer. Then inexplicably we switched roles and I became the mannequin. But instead of putting clothes on me you laughed at my nakedness and you sold me to the owner of a sex shop.

I had a dream about you. You told me you loved me and then you stabbed me with a spoon. Luckily moments before your attack I assumed the identity of a bowl of Jell-O. Later on in the dream as a half-eaten bowl of Jell-O I launched a successful political campaign got elected and moved to Washington DC.

I had a dream about you. You were a lone candle on a barren vanilla cake and I was the mighty breath sent to extinguish your light. I felt like Gods wrath coming down to destroy the Illuminati while you probably thought I was the Satan coming to snuff out the light of the world. And the spectators who were gathered around the spectacle probably thought it was all one big party as they stood still like mindless zombies singing Happy Birthday.