I had a dream about you. You were being hung. I had a sword in one hand and a stool in the other. I couldnt decide which one to use so I stood on the stool and threw myself on the sword. It was the least I could do to protest capital punishment.

I had a dream about you. You were storing my brain in a pickle jar in the fridge and I only discovered it when I went to garnish my hamburger. Mindless and hungry I was a US politicians ideal voter.

I had a dream about you. Your face was puffy like a puffer fish only puffier and I thought it was from crying. Nope turns out you were just fat. But at least you were fat and happy.

A female cop in my dream observes a shuffle and takes note but doesnt fully see the bank robbery I have just committed during the planned distraction. All she sees is a man with a lot of money and draws the wrong conclusionthat I am more handsome now than I was when she didnt know I had money and she saw me walk in the door.

I boasted that I bested the best and I did. I beat my clone. In my dream of course but who cares Its still a victory.

The door handle is on the wrong side of the door. Its on the inside only only in my dreams. I can leave but I cant return.

I had a dream about you. You invited me to a picnic so I brought two bottles of mustardone for me and one for the guy who always holds your leash. When I got there I wondered who is that guy why are you on a leash and who brought the baloney if anybody

I once had a dream about a woman and the next day she died. I stopped sleeping for three days after that to try to save some lives but then my body relented and I went back to being a murderer.

I had a dream about you. We were laying down asphalt and you said we were building a future together. Then I watched as a chicken crossed over our work and I said No we are building a joke.

I had a dream where I lost Capn among the hundreds of black and white cats and they all looked nearly identical to him. It was such a sad dream that it made me drool out of my eyes.