I had a dream about you You were peeing behind a house and when I approached you you smiled and said to me Your face makes me happy I was so flattered by your words and impressed that you could pee and still talk to me.

I had a dream about you you invited me shopping and I was so excited at the thought we were having a day date after we entered the mall you had dropped your wallet and bent down to pick it up I noticed you were wearing a thong. I realized then that shopping was the only intentions you had with me.

I had a dream about you. We were racing to be the slowest person on earth. You were winning which meant you were losing. You were gloating because you were a winner and I was taunting because you were a loser.

I had a dream about you. We spoke as though we shared one mind. And we did though you got to use the brain on Mondays Wednesdays and Fridays while I got it the other days of the week.

I had a dream about you I was cooking dinner and you came out of the bathroom with a troubled look on your face. When I asked what was wrong you said I have never been with a woman over 120lbs I was confused but said nothing then you said The scale says you weigh 122lbs I dont think we can work I was baffled by your strange and cruel attidude and said that you would have to take your food to go.

I had a dream about you. You were washing your car and I was washing my horse. You thought I belonged in the 19th century and I thought you belonged in a zoo. I wasnt alone in thinking thatso were the other 49 of the population that didnt vote you into public office.

I had a dream about you. You introduced me to a clock and Im right handed so I didnt know which clock hand to shake the hour or the minute. So I chose instead to go in for a hug. Big mistake. Time does not like to be embraced by a mere mortal.

I had a dream about you. You were a tax collector and I was a man with a noose around my neck hanging from a tree. You said I could be freed if Id only pay my taxes and I said as long as I paid taxes Id never be free. I said I was freer in a noose than I was under the tax lasso.

I had a dream about you. You were eating angel hair pasta with scissors and I was a long-haired hippy. I yelled Eating pasta with scissorsa not so subtle way to say I need a haircut. To which you replied Well I would have used silverware if you hadnt sold all the forks and spoons to pay for your Ethel Merman addiction.

I had a dream about you. You winked at me and said the meats fresh and I didnt know which meat you were referring to. So I zipped up my pants and left the Mens room in a hurry. Id rather buy my thinly sliced beef somewhere else.